ISN'T ENGLISH A FUNNY LANGUAGE ?
There is no egg in eggplant or ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple...
Is cheese the plural of choose?
If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
In what language do people recite at a play, and play at a recital?
Ship by truck, and send cargo by ship?
Have noses that run and feet that smell?
Park on driveways and drive on parkways?
Sweetmeats are candies, while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.
We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square, and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
And why is it that writers write, but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce, and hammers don't ham?
If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth?
One goose, 2 geese. So, one moose, 2 meese?
One index, two indices?
How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell another?
When a house burns up, it burns down.
You fill in a form by filling it out, and an alarm clock goes off by going on.
When the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.
And why, when I wind up my watch, I start it, but when I wind up this essay, I end it?
English muffins were not invented in England or French fries in France.
Is cheese the plural of choose?
If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
In what language do people recite at a play, and play at a recital?
Ship by truck, and send cargo by ship?
Have noses that run and feet that smell?
Park on driveways and drive on parkways?
Sweetmeats are candies, while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.
We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square, and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
And why is it that writers write, but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce, and hammers don't ham?
If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth?
One goose, 2 geese. So, one moose, 2 meese?
One index, two indices?
How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell another?
When a house burns up, it burns down.
You fill in a form by filling it out, and an alarm clock goes off by going on.
When the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.
And why, when I wind up my watch, I start it, but when I wind up this essay, I end it?
English muffins were not invented in England or French fries in France.
| How can 'slim chance and a fat chance' be the same, while ' wise man and a wise guy' are opposites? |
Now i know why i failed in english.
It's not my fault but the silly language doesn't quite know whether it's coming or going.
Credits to: John_jeni
Your post is quite interesting, but for me, you should not blame the "language" on your failure in English 1. It is our fault that we failed. If we just studied well enough, then we could have passed this subject.
ReplyDeleteI also would like to point out that some points on your post are silly. It does not mean that booth's plural form is beeth just because tooth's pluralized form is teeth.
It's a little bit illogical.
Funny post :)
ReplyDeleteBut I would agree with Jaymico, do not blame English language. Proper and constant study of this language will help you from avoiding mistakes.
Thanks for commenting but I'm not the one who's blaming the language, it's the author. :)
ReplyDeleteJessica has a point. It doesn't mean that she is merely blaming the language. We should appreciate the poem because its goal is to show humor.
ReplyDeleteYour post is fun to read. You should edit the last part, capitalized "I" (pronoun).
ReplyDeleteYour post is entertaining Jessica. I think Jaymico wasn't able to analyze your post.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing such an entertaining post.
ReplyDelete